Happy Easter

Happy Easter to all my friends and family.

Sunday morning the hotel lobby was decorated with thousands of white flowers: lilies, anthuriums, roses, fresias, and blossoms I had never seen before. These arrangements stood ten or twelve feet tall!



It would be nice to think that the hotel was decorated for Easter, but actually it was for the engagement of the general manager's daughter the night before. There was a big celebration, and no expense was spared for the occasion.



Whatever the reason for the white flowers, it was nice to be reminded of purity, new birth, and resurrection. I hope that your Easter was good and that you got to attend church with family or friends.

India is a mostly Hindu country with a very large Muslim population and then a small Christian minority. Here in Mumbai, a major metropolitan city of eighteen million people, there are church services in English, Hindi, Malayalam, Marathi, Tamil, and Telegu.

I think I've just been offended

Remember that old Scope mouthwash commercial where the coworkers would leave a bottle of Scope on their colleague's desk and hope that he/she would take the hint and get the point?

Well...

I was setting up the classroom for work tonight when my co-trainer asked, "Roger, do you like something sweet?" Assuming he meant candy, because I like to put out chocolate Kisses at each computer for the first night of class, I replied Thank you but that I was full because I had just had dinner and really didn't need anything.

He pulls a little foil packet out of his pocket and said, "Try this. You'll really like it." He explained that it tasted good and that there were six little tablets in the packet but to not take them all at once, to chew them slowly throughout the day. And something about being "digestive tablets" and thus "feeling fresh." (Here they don't have "mouthwash" but "breath freshener." Same idea. Halitosis in any language is still bad news.)

The bright orange and yellow packet has a picture of a wise old grandfather and a little girl with her dog. The brand name is Hajmola, and the slogan is "Hazam sab, chahey jab." It evidently rhymes, and who knows what it means; but probably something like "Your breath is peeyuu, these mints are for you."

Printed on the back are the ingredients: Samudra Lavan, Krishna Lavan, Navsadar, Kshudhavardhak Churna, Nimbu Saar, Jeeraka, kali Marich, Sunthi, and Pippali. Yikes! He wants me to put that into my mouth and CHEW ON IT?

A quick Google search on the the workd "Hajmola" takes me to

http://www.dabur.com/EN/products/Health_Care/Digestive/hajmola/

where I learn that the product is a "tasty fun-filled digestive" that has the following Health Benefits:
- Eases condition of flatulence ...like I needed to know that

- Controls Dyspepsia ...whatever that is

- Increases appetite ...that's working just fine

- Helps in proper digestion and relieves indigestion ...no problems there

"Pop a Dabur Hajmola - and enjoy the chatpata flavour that stimulates your digestive power. Take it regularly, especially after a heavy meal. And savour every bite with this tasty digestive tablet."

Fortunately the Dabur website reassures me that it is made up of "a mix of traditional Indian culinary herbs, spices and edible salts." Uh, I think I'll try a Certs. And if you'd like to see a funky surreal little commercial for the product, go to http://www.dabur.com/EN/Videos/Default.asp?ID=107 where the gentleman is Amitabh Banchan, India's greatest Bollywood actor. (He's even got his own website at http://www.amitabhbachchan.net/ )

At least the little foil packet only costs 1 Indian Rupee so if I don't like it, we're only out two and a half cents.

(Scroll to the very bottom, or press END on your keyboard, to see a link to PHOTOS from my trip!)

Announcing a new world's record!

The latest "Batch" of employees to go through our training scored a 99.03% on their Final Assessment. We had promised them a pizza party if they managed to beat the previous record, and they did... so we did.


I am very proud of everyone: Benny, Paresh, Prathim, Dheeraj, Mickey, Mohsan, Roger (especially), Pryank, Sameer, and Vikas, and (in the front row) Monica, Saloni, Lavina, Atul, Shilpa, Wayne, Kanull, Namita, and Nikhil.


Young people everywhere like pizza, even at three o'clock in the morning. These came from "Smoking Joes" and I can guarantee that they are SPICY! No pepperoni because Muslims cannot eat pork and no beef because Hindus cannot eat beef, so chicken and lamb pizza toppings (and vegetarian) reign supreme. Same thing at Subway sandwich shops (which I visited in Hyderabad) and at McDonalds (which I have NOT been to).

Time flies when you're having fun... or sleep-deprived

For the first seven weeks of this project we were working nights, from 10:00 p.m. to 7:00 a.m. to better correspond with normal American business hours. Suddenly for some unknown reason we got switched to days 8-5 for a week and then, just as our bodies were getting used to the new schedule, we got switched back to nights again. Except that, after one three-day class it was Daylight Savings Time in the United States so classes started one hour earlier. For the remaining four classes in the next two weeks I will be training from 7:00 p.m. to 4:00 a.m. with a one-hour commute on both sides.

As a result my poor body doesn't know whether it is coming or going. Is it time to get up or time to go to sleep? Am I sleepy and I need to go to bed, or just tired? Is it time for dinner (just before going to work for the night) or time for breakfast (after work and just before going to sleep for the day) or is it just a snacky-hunger?

And the weird thing is that your "day" off is also from 7:00 p.m. to 4:00 a.m. and there's not a whole lot of sightseeing you can do at that time of day, and what there is might get you arrested!

:)

The last few days I've been crashing right into bed when I get back in the morning, not going for a jog and not even eating breakfast. But I get a good dinner (even if it is afore-mentioned hors d'oeuvres in the Executive Lounge on the Concierge Floor) and then take along a sandwich and some fruit for our half-hour meal break at 11:15 p.m.

As a result I haven't published any new posts here in the blog since last week. One, I've been too tired; and two, I haven't done anything worth writing about!

But I think now my body is adjusting back to "normal" << whatever that is. Maybe we'll have news on a regular basis again soon?

Monday Night at the Movies

I have really wanted to go to a movie since we got here, because the Indian film industry is just HUGE. They call it "Bollywood" because most all of the films are made right here in Bombay. It churns out more movies, in three languages (English, Hindi, and Telegu) than we do back in the States.

A new movie "Being Cyrus" has had lots of newspaper ads and posters all over the city, and from the reviews it sounded like a quirky light comedy, so I decided to see it after our city sightseeing tour today. The theatre is only a 20-minute walk from the hotel, and tickets are only 70 rupees (where 44IR = $1) so it was a no-brainer.

Boy, what a mistake. After an average beginning, and then an hour of on-again/off-again adultery, murder, arguing, weird dream sequences... I finally realized it wasn't going to get any better and redeem itself. I decided didn't want to subject my spirit to any more of this garbage and that I had had enough, so I walked out.

I went to the ticket window to complain but they would have none of it. A ticket sold is a ticket sold. So I tore up said ticket into little bits and pushed it through the window back at them.

The only problem is that this is the only cinema hall within walking distance (20 minutes) so I have to go back and buy a ticket from the same little man if I want to see another movie.

:(

Kind of a downer way to end a fun day, but it can't all be roses.

Remember the creepy broken-down house from last night's "walk on the wild side"? Well, I walked past it this afternoon on the way to the cinema hall, and it looked just as foreboding in the daytime. And then a man walked out the front door! Maybe someone is living there?

India never ceases to surprise me, every single day.

What will tomorrow hold? Who knows! Keep your eyes open.

"What I did on my summer vacation, er, uh, day off."

Batch Five here in Mumbai was Friday through Sunday, from 6:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. All the students did very well; their questions and participation showed they were following (and absorbing) the material quite well, and their high test scores proved it!

Brian and I came home via tuk-tuk, an autorickshaw. It is a LOT cheaper than the hotel car (only 75 rupees versus 1600 rupees) and a lot more exciting than the boring air conditioned hotel car. This is a picture of one parked alongside of the road as we zipped by.

I crashed into bed, because today was A DAY OFF! WOO-HOO!!

Woke up early this morning at 7:00 a.m. but, what with all the schedule changes, I am not sure any more if that is early, or late, or right on time!

Downstairs for a delicious breakfast buffet: fried potato wedges, a mini-quiche, bacon, camembaert cheese, french bread, orange juice, mango juice, apple juice, scrambled eggs with chicken/cheese/olives. I also had a chocolate milkshake, but remember that (just like in France) a "milkshake" is just that: shaken up milk! No ice cream...

Upstairs to brush my teeth and grab my supplies for the day: bottle of water, camera with fresh battery, sunglasses, credit card, and room key... and then downstairs again to meet our guide.

Turns out she is a pretty young lady who did a commerce degree and works in a tourism office, and who gives these tours when asked. Actually the tour (set up by the hotel) is free, sponsored by a handcrafts store. You see the city and at the end you visit the store and they hope you will buy something.

Our driver didn't speak much English at all but he was very safe (again, no seat belts in the back) so that was OK. Bremela made up for him, as she knew everything about Mumbai and could answer all my questions.

We saw the outdoor laundry pits where washermen from all over the city come seven days a week to do laundry... for the whole neighborhood!

We visited a large Jain temple, a branch of Hinduism. Jains do not wear leather, are total vegetarian, and do not even eat root vegetables, only those that grow above ground. The temple was interesting, all in marble and silver, full of idols, with people praying and chanting, and workmen painting. You cannot wear shoes inside, so we had to leave our shoes (and socks) outside with the guard. I'm thinking, "Those $80 shoes (that I got on sale for $40) had BETTER be there when I got back!" But that is what the guard is for, and that is what the tip for the guard is for. It felt strangly unhygienic to be walking around barefooted where hundreds of other people had walked, but the marble floor was certainly cool under your feet.

We visited the Gateway to India, built in 1911 to mark the visit of King George and Queen Victoria to Bombay.

We drove past the museum house where Mohandas K. Gandhi spent several years of his life, the High Court, the University of Mumbai, and Victoria Terminus railway station. Colonial British architecture is just incredible, and reminds you of how, at the the time, India was an outpost of British civilization. For more pictures, please see http://photos.yahoo.com/RogerAgness .

And just like the United States, every tour ends at the gift shop. The (free!) tour was sponsored by a large shop which sold intricate silk and wool carpets and also exquisite jewelry and handicrafts. Everything was simply beautiful but way out of my price range. I'll have to come back when I am married so I can be talked into it.

:)

Back at the hotel around three o'clock Brian and I had lunch, or was it dinner? The buffet was closing in just fifteen minutes, but I told the waitress I could do a lot of damage in fifteen minutes. I loaded up a plate with chicken curry, lamb curry, more camembaert cheese, pasta with chicken and cheese, apple crumble, and brownie.

And in fact I DID do some damage. As I slid the tongs under a slice of chocolate cake, it was more attached to the plate than one would think it would be and I slid the glass plate right off its stand and it shattered into a million pieces on the marble table top! You could hear the clutter all over the restaurant and I felt like a million eyes were looking at me, and especially the eyes of all the servers and wait staff. They assured me that it was not a problem and not to worry, but I am going to look at this week's hotel bill carefully, just in case.

:(

Take a walk on the wild side...

Today was the last day for Batch Five here in Mumbai. They passed with flying colors, and averaged 92.5% on the final exam for the three-day training class.

Brian and I took a tuk-tuk autorickshaw back to the hotel. It's much cheaper (70 rupees compared to 1600 rupees) and much more interesting than the boring airconditioned hotel cars.

:)

I cleaned up and checked email, and then went up to the Executive Lounge (my, doesn't THAT sound impressive) for dinner. Actually it is hors d'oeuvres but, hey, if you eat enough of them it is as good as dinner. AND IT'S FREE! I had two nice pieces of roasted fish, two chicken fingers with special sauce, two quesadillas with different special sauce, two olive-and-mushroom mini kebabs on skewers, two glasses of apple juice ("Sir, we do apologize but it is canned and not fresh. Would that be acceptable?") and one dessert... cheesecake with raspberry topping. You only need ONE of those.

I watched the sun sink into the ocean from the fifth-floor vantage point, and then decided to go for a walk. We don't have to work tomorrow (hurray!) and it is a real DAY off, not a night off. Brian and I are planning to go sightseeing, our first in the two weeks we've been here.

He had mentioned driving past a movie theater last week while out on a shopping expedition so I headed off. Down the big stone staircase to the big iron gates. Wave at the (twelve) security guards so they see you going out, so they will maybe let you back in again. Look both ways and step out into the street. Literally. Remember, no sidewalks!

Head north. Normally the car turns east here on our way to work but I am going to continue on straight.

A big empty closed hotel, the Tulip Star. It looks like it was quite the place, but is now dry and dusty with broken-out windows, watched over by two security men out front behind more big iron gates.

St. Joseph's Catholic Church and School. Closed now, but I peeked my head inside last week on my way back from jogging. I was sweaty and smelly and wearing shorts so I didn't dare go in, but the service looked nice. More big iron gates, but they were open. Tonight I was better dressed, so walked into the courtyard, and found a small cemetary... and a fresh grave, still mounded up and totally covered with bright orange marigold and carnation petals.

A little clothing store "In Top" that might have had some cool T-shirts with fun slogans and stuff, but didn't. But DID have a whole surprise grocery section in about an area about six feet square. You'd be amazed what all they can cram in a small space, even Kellogg's cereals and Old El Paso Taco Shells!

Vegetable sellers still offering their wares at night, in the dark, without streetlights, but sometimes with a candle for light. Mangy dogs wandering the streets. Families out for a walk. Men sitting in shop doorways discussing who knows what. Boys repairing shoes out on the sidewalk. A tiny tiny barbershop filled by two barbers and their customers, one getting a shave with a straight razor and one getting a haircut, which reminds me that my own hair could use a trim. A single lane street full of people talking and laughing, that cars and motorbikes are still barreling down, with their lights off. Ladies in beautiful sarees of all colors, bright even in the dark. A man sleeping on the sidewalk with a sheet pulled up over him.

Down and around, past what was billed as the bus station but was more like a wide pullover/layby.

A huge Hare Krishna temple that people were constantly streaming in and out of. I am told that every town here has one, and it seems to be just one more temple among many thousands here, rather than the weird cult like it is in the United States. Loud din of music and chanting... which was still loud in the little green park next door. Truly a pocket-park, I walked once around it and back out again.

Past more tiny shops and stalls through more streets packed with people and cars and motorbikes and autorickshaws, and through a couple of mud puddles, avoiding the inevitable potholes. (Did you know the "inevitable" is French for "unavoidable"?)

Turn a corner and past a spooky decrepit falling-down three-story house. In the States it would have been torn down and built upon, or at least paved over. In Europe it would have been taken over by squatters. But here because of laws the families or creditors can leave it just sit empty for years. There are buildings all over where the top floor is not finished, just rebars reaching up into space, or the front facade and walls not there. This house looked like it had really been something back in the day, but today is an empty broken shell. What stories does it hold?

And speaking of French, turn another corner and voila! Shopper's Stop, a three-story department store. Only open nine months it had ladies' wear and cosmetics on the ground floor, children's wear on the first (second) floor, and men's wear and sporting goods on the second (third) floor, and a new five-screen movie theatre on the third (fourth) floor that will be opening in just three weeks. And the whole basement floor was books. I was in my element there. Fortunately I only had 100 rupees in my pocket and no credit cards, so I was safe.

:)

Mumbai (formerly Bombay) is the center of India's prodigious film industry, so much that they call it "Bollywood." There are many cinemas and here are five more. Maybe I'll get to see the grand opening?

Nine o'clock and time to start walking back. I was only half an hour from the hotel, but was still light years away. I really didn't know at all where I was and couldn't have found a main road if I'd had to, but at least knew the way I came (didn't I?) and could trace my way back, so I did.

Saw everything from the other side, and in reverse order. It's nine thirty at night, and there are still hundreds of people out, of ALL ages. From little children to grandparents. And the little shops and vendors are still open: paper collectors, vegetable carts, laundry and dry cleaning, fresh dairy milk delivered to your door, photocopies made, and so much more.

I wish you could be here. I think you'd really enjoy it. It really is like living inside the Discovery Channel, or National Geographic.

Well, I made it back to the hotel (was there ever any doubt?) and am typing up this blog entry for you. More adventures tomorrow...